foodchewer:

i don’t want to go to sleep i want to be famous

meladoodle:

ladies laaaaadies, theres plenty of me to go around *detaches arm* thats for you Brenda

thetowndrugdealer:

"you look tired, are you???" 
"no, im just ugly"

taxicar:

choking on a food you love is the ultimate betrayal 

(Source: taxicar)